Creepiness: The Ultimate Turn-off

I count many women among my friends and all of them agree on one thing: creepy is NOT sexy.

What’s creepy?

creep•y (krp)
adj. creep•i•er, creep•i•est Informal
1. Of or producing a sensation of uneasiness or fear, as of things crawling on one's skin: a creepy feeling; a creepy story.
2. Annoyingly unpleasant; repulsive: the creepy kids next door.

Creepy covers everything that will drive women away before you even talk to them.

It takes a split second to appear creepy and once labeled, there’s simply no way back.

Women are hardwired to sense a potential threat to their physical integrity. It stems from thousands of years of evolution. In fact, due to the costs of childbearing and the risks of physical violence it is indeed safe to assume that women have developed a keen perception of any red flag.

“But I’m a nice guy!”
… “Who cares?”

You could be the nicest guy on the planet and still act like a creep around women. These two are not mutually exclusive.

On the other hand, there are plenty of tattooed womanizers who give a less creepy vibe than most “nice” guys wearing a button-down shirt and suede loafers.

Introverted men with limited social skills tend to give the creepy vibe. 

And no-one wants to stick around long enough to find out if the first impression was justified.

Here’s a non-exhaustive list of creepy behaviours :

- Approaching someone from behind

- Fascination with Horror movies, Computer games, Heroic Fantasy, military paraphernalia  and other similar crap

- Standing silently ogling at a girl forever before talking to her

- Incessant emails of phone calls. (Also applies to FB chatting and other means of communication.)

- Acting as if you were already in a long-term relationship after only a couple of dates.

- Not getting the hint when a girl is not willing to talk. You talk to her on the street, she says she has a boyfriend and she doesn’t have time. Just move on. Persistence is just another word for ‘C-R-E-E-P’.

- Asking personal questions in rapid succession. This raises a huge red flag: “What on earth is he going to do with that information?”

- Being excessively apologetic.

- Singing Radiohead’s Creep in a karaoke bar…

As I pointed out, the list is far from exhaustive.

As a general rule, a woman’s creep alarm will go off every time 1) a man appears to have dubious unspoken intentions and/or 2) brings persistence to the point of not understanding the difference between Yes and No.

The Anti-Creep recipe

Here’s a list of a things you can do to give a positive vibe:

- Engage into social activities, make friends from both genders.

- Face the person you're talking with. Maintain a fair amount of eye-contact.

- Speak up, say what’s on your mind. People are more likely to trust someone who is straightforward about his intentions. Be courteous, but don’t let excessive politeness blur the message.

- Don’t take everything, including yourself, so bloody seriously.

- Put on a smile.

- Balance questions with information about yourself. Self-disclosure brings self-disclosure.

- Give her space. That means leaving ONE message and waiting for a reply.

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